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Tuesday, March 02, 2004
We have finally been able to begin hazing in the new operative. We have been seeing how she deals with stressful situations, chasing her around the furniture, swatting at her when she isn't looking, and charging at her during our exercise, when we practice jumping at things the female throws in the air. We have noticed quite a few times when she has bitten the male's toe, an obvious attempt to kill him. So far she has held up nicely. She clearly has potential. Perhaps her soft looks belie her talent as an operative.
She does not seem terribly bothered by all the posturing we have been doing, which is good. But she needs to straighten up and realize that we aren't here to be lap cats. We are highly trained operatives with a mission of critical importance. We can't spend our days sitting on some human's lap. Not even if that human rubs our head and hand-feeds us honey smoked turkey.
Incidentally, we have determined that her service records were incorrect. She is not a Himalayan after all, she is a Birman. This makes a huge difference. The Himalayan is a human-bred show cat that has many of the genetic weaknesses of all things created by those megalomaniacal apes. The Birman, on the other hand, is a pure-blooded race of cats from Bast Prime whose bloodline goes back many generations, and was a part of the original operation which seeded us on this planet. The giveaway was the white toes and the pure feline face, not the drawn out jowl of a Siamese(May Bast curse that traitorous lot for abandoning our homeworld!)
We still think she looks too prissy to be an effective agent, but we suppose that there are operations for which she is suited. We were dismayed at first because we were expecting more of a field kitten. Perhaps a long-haired tabby or even a Maine Coon mix. We were not expecting a lipstick operative. Seriously, just look at her:
We officially greeted earlier today, so she now knows she will be staying on here. Soon we will make it clear to her that this is no free ride.
